In this issue...
CELEBRATING FAMILY: The Role of Holiday Rituals
BOOK IDEAS: Celebrations Around the World
BOOK REVIEW: The Marvelous Journey Home
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Happy Holidays!
December 2008
The holidays we celebrate and the way we celebrate them, are an important part of our culture. They say so much about the history, values and beliefs of the people who honor these traditions.
Many of our children, born in one culture and raised in another, have a dual identity, as in "Colombian-American" or "Ethiopian-American". Our children will learn what it means to be American through many sources; what they learn in school, their religious practice, food they eat, music they hear as well as from the everyday sights, sounds and smells that surround them.
Many American parents have immigrant grandparents, great-grandparents or great-great grandparents. We may have heard a different language spoken in our homes or celebrated holidays and eaten foods "from the old country". These were among the many ways that we learned what it meant to be Italian, Polish, Greek and so on.
Many families continue traditions that were handed down from generation to generation. For the family formed through international adoption, how will the learning of ancestral culture take place when there are no ancestors to "hand them down"?
Some parents might wonder if "birth culture" matters when their child is being raised in America. Think of it this way, your child will spend the rest of his life answering "Ethiopia, China, India, etc" when asked, "Place of birth". How many times have you been asked "place of birth" in your life time? (and you may well look similar to your parents or relatives). What if you were brown skinned and the rest of your family was light skinned? More reason to be asked, "Where were you born?" or "Where are you from?" No way around it, your child's country of birth is part of who he is.
Most celebrations are joyful.a time to eat, sing, laugh and enjoy the company of family and friends. Finding a way to bring celebrations from your child's birth culture into your family is a way of celebrating that child. It is a way of saying, "we love all of who you are".
There are many books written about the various ways that countries around the world celebrate. Many in the US are familiar with the Chinese New Year and Rosh Ha-Shanah, the Jewish New Year, but did you know about Enkutatash, the Ethiopian Orthodox New Year that celebrates new life, the blooming of maskal and the end of the rainy season?
World Book's "Celebrations and Rituals around the World" series offers a colorful look at the way a variety of cultures bring in the New Year. Follow the link below to a list of books that you may want to read with your children or use to gather ideas for ways that you can bring a celebration from your child's country of birth into your family's holiday rituals. Start a new tradition, one that is special and unique to your family! Have fun!
Wide Horizons Post Adopt Education and Support Team
Pat ~ Barb ~ Betsey ~ Christine
Deb ~ Jennifer ~ Nancy ~ Nicole
MEET THE TEAM
The Wide Horizons For Children Post Adoption team offers clinical and program support to local families. Each member of the team has extensive expertise in several of the following areas:
- Post placement counseling for all members of the adoption triad, including:
- Birth parents - issues related to grief, loss and adjustment
- Adoptive parents - issues related to adjustment and talking with children about adoption
- Adopted adults - issues related to search and reunion
- Facilitating birth family/adoptee search and reunion
- Information and resources for homeland tours
If you have questions or concerns, contact the Post Adoption counselor in your area:
Connecticut Eastern & Central Massachusetts Western Massachusetts, New Jersey, & New York |
New Hampshire & Vermont Rhode Island All other states |
For more information about our Post Adoption team, visit www.whfc.org.
CELEBRATING FAMILY: The Role of Holiday Rituals
Most families have rituals over the holidays. Some are simple and unspoken, some are elaborate with the finest details. Some families come together and fill a house with the hustle and bustle of gifts, laughter, and high energy. Some families celebrate quietly and the peace of the season brings family members an inner, beautiful joy. However your family honors the season, the holidays are opportunities to foster attachment and build family cohesiveness and this is especially important for adoptive families. Something as simple as planning a holiday dinner menu together can pull family member into a ritual that becomes a full sensory experience. In many ways, family identity is as important as individual identity. Family identity can be like the rich soil from which your child's identity grows and develops.
Read the rest of Barb's article at www.whfc.org.
One Family's Holiday
Holidays are a special time... family gathers around and traditions begin. TRADITIONS... that magical word that can result in the creation of memories. Memories that we want for our children so they can always look back on them, smile, and reminisce.
Upon choosing adoption, our family motto has become a quote from Maya Angelou:
"Families are held together by choice. Members are alike and unalike yet there is comfort in the sameness and excitement in the differences. When we respect and relish BOTH conditions we can call ourselves FAMILY."
Read more about the Powers family's holiday at www.whfc.org.
BOOK IDEAS: Celebrations Around the World
Celebrating Birthdays in China and Celebrating Birthdays in Russia by Cheryl Enderlein, 1998
A Calendar of Holidays of the World, by Cherry Gilchrist, 2006
Celebrations Around the World: A Multicultural Handbook, by Carole S. Angell, 1996
Kids Around the World Celebrate: The Best Feasts and Festivals from Many Lands, by Lynda Jones, 1999
Children Just Like Me: Celebrations!, by Anabel and Barnaby Kindersley, 1997
Totline Small World Celebrations: Around-the-World Holidays to Celebrate with Young Children, by Jean Warren, Elizabeth McKinnon, Marion Ekberg, 1988
Celebrations of Light: A Year of Holidays Around the World, by Nancy Luenn, 1998
Birthdays Around the World, by Mary Lankford, 2002
Christmas Around the World, by Mary Lankford, Karen Dugan, Irene Norman, 1998
Celebrate! Connections among Cultures, by Jan Reynolds, 2006
World Book's 'Celebrations and Rituals around the World' Series: New Year's Celebrations, by Alison Milbank, 2002
Resources for purchasing books online:
Children of the World — www.childrenoftheworld.biz
Barefoot Books Stallholder — www.barefootbooks.wordpress.com
BOOK REVIEW: The Marvelous Journey Home
Written by John Simmons
In his book "The Wonderful Journey Home," John Simmons has written what he describes as a "thinly veiled" work of semi-fiction based on the adoption of two children that he and his wife brought home from Russia in 2005. Mr. Simmons has written a credible and heartwarming story that conveys many of the challenges experienced during an adoption process. For the most part, "The Marvelous Journey Home" is a splendid and realistic description of one family's experience during a heartwarming, tug-at-your-heartstrings, Russian adoption process. It will have particular appeal for those starting their adoption journey. It's a worthwhile read and will help people understand and prepare for the journey ahead.
Read Vicki's complete review at www.whfc.org.
REGIONAL EVENTS
Register today for upcoming workshops and family events:
| Date | Event | Location |
| 1/10/2009 | Celebrating Your Child's Korean Birth Culture | East Greenbush, NY |
| 1/28/2009 | Sign With Your Child (for parents & children) | Latham, NY |
| 2/7/2009 | Sledding and ice skating at White Park | Concord, NH |
| TBD - 2/2009 | Open Forum - panel of adult adoptees | TBD, RI |
| 2/28/2009 | Western MA & Greater Albany Mid-Winter Family Party | Pittsfield, MA |
| TBD - 3/2009 | International Adoption - Understanding Your Child's Medical Record & Referral Information | Greater Albany Area, NY |
| 3/14/2009 | 8th Annual China Culture Camp | Marlborough, MA |
| TBD - 4/2009 | Family Day at Roger Williams Zoo | Providence, RI |
| 4/25/2009 | 25th Annual Korean Culture Camp | Marlborough, MA |
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