It Only Takes a Moment to Change a Lifetime

By Anna P.

It's strange how one moment can change a lifetime forever. My mother changed my life forever when she left her home in the Philippines and moved to rural Alabama with her naval officer husband. I was the only Asian child in my school system, neighborhood, and paternal family. My mother was the only one who served rice with every meal, spoke a different language, and had family overseas. My life has been dichotomous for as long as I can remember. I grew up on a farm but was always listening for a distant ocean lapping against a sand-strewn beach. I lived in Alabama but my heart was in the Philippines and there it would return thirty years later to reclaim a lost family, fulfill a longing inside of myself, and to claim my beautiful new daughter who would bridge a gap that time and culture had created.

My husband and I had discussed adoption early on in our marriage but with the birth of our daughter, Payton and our son, Stone, three and a half years later our lives were busy. As our children grew before our eyes, we felt almost complete and it was the almost that kept us awake at night watching our children sleep. I felt like my prayers had been answered but I was a boat adrift at sea when it came to the adoption process.

I knew in my heart that my child was in the Philippines and so we waited and searched for the right agency. At a retreat, God's hand rested upon my shoulder as the first speaker rose to discuss her experience with adoption. I spoke with her after the lecture and she gave me all the information to begin our adoption process. The process felt overwhelming at times but so did waiting to hold our new daughter. I still remember seeing her photo for the first time. I felt the same feeling that I felt when I held each one of my children for the first time but this feeling was accompanied with a pain because my new baby was thousands of miles away. My family and I waited for the phone call that would ensure our daughter's delivery into my eager arms. The call finally came. My mother, grandmother, sister, and I returned to the islands together for the first time in twenty-one years. We visited family in Bacolod and were joined by a cousin for the trip to Cebu. Once we pulled into the driveway of the shelter and saw the sign welcoming us there I knew that at any moment my precious girl, who was just a toddler, would be in my arms. It is a feeling that is impossible to convey in words alone. Little did I know that she had already spotted me and fled into the shelter crying and clutching my photo. I was not prepared for the next two days of our new life. She knew that something was changing and this caused her to cry in my presence, bond with my cousin-who resembled a house mother, and shy away from her new family. To help her adjust, I played with other children in the home while she watched. During this time I became close with some of the other children, especially a little boy named Brian who melted all of our hearts with his innocent smile.

Two days later with a lot of patience and persistence from my end, my baby reached out for me and never let go again. She slowly adjusted to her new home, her first winter, having two older siblings, learning a new language, and having parents.

Today, my children have become more giving, loving, and caring as a result of the adoption of her and our oldest son. Yes, we adopted again! As our little girl became essential to our lives and happiness, we felt that longing for a sweet little boy with a beautiful smile that played with us at the shelter. We didn't need a photo or a match; we had already met him and I prayed every night that he would find a family. He was eleven years old when I met him and I knew that his chance for adoption was narrowing.

Every time I looked at my smiling girl I thought of how fortunate we were to have her and yet I thought of that little boy waiting. My husband prayed about the decision to adopt again and told me to make the phone call.

I returned once again to the shelter. This time my son ran into my arms. He got to meet all of his aunts, uncles, and cousins in Bacolod. He had three siblings waiting at home for him and for the first time in his life, he has a father. My husband and I feel very blessed in having been chosen to be the parents of our two, beautiful children. We finally have that feeling of fulfillment and happiness. We never intended to have a large family but we can't imagine our lives any other way. When our daughters crawl into bed side by side telling each other good night and snuggling in close to each other, we know that we made the right decision. When our boys wrestle their way down the hall, tumble into their beds, and tell each other that they love one another, we know that our family is what it was always intended to be. complete.